02/01/2017
Today is the
beginning of a new adventure, but how many times have I been here? Many times.
So how do I know this time will be different? I have no idea. But here I am,
writing my first official “blog.” When am I going to post it? Who knows? Will someone
even care? I have no idea. But here I am, doing it. Hopefully I will feel
productive after a few hours. Have you ever felt that way before? I hope so, so
I don’t feel so lonely in this fight toward resistance.
Yesterday was my
last day working in an immigration law office. I started in November 2016 and
finished January 31st (yesterday). Today I woke up feeling alone and
lost. Why? Who knows? So I went deep within myself and I sensed fear. Who quits
a job to follow a dream? Guess who? Me!!! But where the hell do I start? Why are
my fears all suddenly here again? Well, I put aside those feelings and reached
out to one of my cheerleaders, a wonderful friend who will send me good vibes without
questioning. Knowing someone has my back, I continued my morning routine, getting
my son ready for school, getting breakfast for him, etc. I kind of screwed up
when I told him he did not do his best at something. You could see I hurt his
feelings, so I apologized and also explained that in life people would probably
hurt his feelings and that one of the better ways to manage that was not to
take things personally.
I came back from
dropping him off at school and said to myself that I’d better be productive, so
I made myself my breakfast, checked Facebook, cleaned around, did laundry, vacuumed
2 rooms and sat on my ass in this chair to write to you. And who are you? I would
love to know. Maybe we have a few things in common or maybe you will hate my guts
to talk about my life publicly and without filters. Maybe you totally disagree
with me, and that is fine. Maybe you even say, “How dare she write in English
when she can’t actually write correctly.” Oh well, that is me. I just want to
write, enjoy, and leave something out there, probably to hold me accountable in
my new adventure of actually running my own business as a life coach.
I have done it for
a long time but free of charge, or I would ask in return to go out to a
restaurant, etc. There is no doubt this is what I want. Do I have the perfect
life? No, I don’t. But thank goodness I have learned (but not yet mastered) to
deal with what life throws at me. I also am aware that feelings have to go out,
and journaling helps me do that. I am thankful for who I am, and that I try
every day to walk my talk. What is my talk? You probably will get to know it
soon. I will be writing just because I want to. Will I be writing only
beautiful and inspiring things? Hell no! You will see here my greatest, my
lowest, the scariest and the joyful me. But at the end, all is fine as soon as
I get it out. I feel the love in me, and that is the beauty of it. My plan is
to blog or post or however it is called: some is my journaling, and some is
from years and years ago. I have changed in many things and in others not. I
will always tell you around what time it was written. But this one today is
from today: Wednesday, February 1st, 2017. And I will leave you with
my new slogan for 2017: I WALK MY TALK AND I OWN MY SHIT!
With love,
Me
